Faithful

Every night as I fall asleep, I feel the earth shake as a subway passes by underground. And every time, that unsettling feeling reminds me of just how unstable and fragile life is. The more uncertainties I face, the more absurd the idea of life without God sounds to me. Everything around us is constantly in motion, even if we cannot see it with our naked eye. That is why only in the stillness can we hear God. The more I observe and experience this world and the people around me, the more certain I am of a higher power, of my higher power. No one is strong enough nor made to do life alone. We are wonderfully and fearfully made. We were designed to need a savior.

Lately I've been reading inspirational novels such as The power of Now, A New Earth, The Tao of Pooh, The Alchemist, and The Book of Flying. I've learned a lot through their insights, both things I agree with and things I don't agree with. They say that the answers, nothingness and simplicity, can be found within ourselves. That true happiness comes from within. They say that death is the way to life. And in a way I agree, but if we are to die and be rid of self in order to just be, that leaves us as just a part of creation, which leads back to God. And if being is not about us, as in you or me, then it must be about something or someone else, which also points to God. Moral of the story: it's not about me or you, it's about something bigger. Everything is connected. Everything is for the glory of God.

It's no coincidence that all of these novels came during this transitional stage in my life. They keep reinforcing what God wants me to learn at the moment, even though all this new information raises more questions and causes some confusion. But if I strip away all the details and emotional junk, the lesson is simply this: God is with me, and I am here for a purpose. He has a custom-made plan for me, it is already in motion, and nothing can stop me from fulfilling his will. God is faithful and the only solidity I truly have and know.

I am blessed that it's not about me. I am blessed that I do not have to create and guess my own destiny. I appreciate and embrace fully what is and what I have. God will use me, because he is within me.